A third and probably last Muse story.
ZING!
“Hello muse. You haven’t appeared for a while.”
“Hi Dave, well you haven’t needed direct assistance for a while, although I have nudged you a little from time to time.”
“Yes” I smiled. “I have felt you trying to get in on a least one story.”
“Sorry about that.” She looked a little shamefaced. “It’s a good job you resisted. It became a wonderful trilogy.” She perked up. “So, how can I help you this time? Its obvious you’re having difficulties with something or I wouldn’t be here.”
“Well, I’ve got two stories started that I’m a bit stuck with, but I wanted to write some more about Jane and Dave, you remember them? And as you seem to have some affinity with Jane I thought you could help.”
“Should I put the bikini on?” She grinned. I paused before answering.
“Well, if it helps you Sara, but I have to say it is a bit distracting when you wear it. You look so pretty in it.” She blushed and laughed at the same time.
“All right. No distractions, and thank you for the compliment.” This time I blushed. “Come on then, fill me in on the basics.”
“I was thinking of doing a ‘two-hander’ about the different ways they’re handling being attracted but apart.”
“Sounds interesting. You start with him and I’ll come up with something for her.”
Dave was on a train. He and Jane had arranged to meet in Bristol this weekend for the wedding of some mutual friends. He could have driven, but that would have given him an easy escape if things went wrong. Besides, the train journey gave him time to think and plan. There were so many things he wanted to say, to tell her, but he didn’t know how. You couldn’t just drop these things into the conversation could you? ‘Would you like a coffee, and by the way, I think I love you.’ It felt like a phoney way to do it, and one thing he was determined never to be with Jane was phoney.
It had been eight months since they had first met, and since then they had managed to meet only four times. They kept in touch by phone and e-mail, but it wasn’t the same. Their last meeting had been two months ago at Christmas. That had been a wonderful time, marred only by his constant worrying that she was much too good for him. She was so pretty she could surely attract someone much better, and closer to home too. If only he could find the courage to tell her his feelings and share his worries. He made a decision. This weekend would be make or break, for Jane’s sake and the sake of his sanity. He would make himself say something and hope it was the right thing.
“Wow!” Said Sara. “You’ve filled him with all your own anxieties.” She smiled at me. “Even if he had a different name he’d be you.” I reddened again.
“Thank you.” I said sarcastically. “I prefer to think of him as me ramped up by five.”
“Whatever you say Dave.” She said, with a hint of disbelief. “Okay, my turn with Jane now. Ready to write?”
“Want to write it yourself?” I asked.
“Can I? That would be nice.” I moved away from the keyboard and let Sara sit down.
“Take it away Muse.”
Jane was on a train too, for pretty much the same reasons. She was thinking about their Christmas meeting. It had been great to meet up again, but it was obvious to her that Dave had something on his mind. She had thought about it a lot since and was hoping that he hadn’t found another girl closer to home. She didn’t want to lose her modest gentle hero. Another possibility was that perhaps he thought their long-distance relationship wasn’t working. She had tried to do something about this by seeking employment closer to where he was, but nothing had come of it so far. Maybe she should tell him of her feelings? But he kept so much to himself she wasn’t sure if that was the right thing to do, force it like that. No! She thought, this time something has to be said. They couldn’t just let it drift like this any longer, even if it meant she lost him. Hopefully though it wouldn’t come to that. Another thought struck her. Maybe nothing was wrong with Dave and she was projecting her own insecurities onto him? Whatever it was, they needed to talk. If it was all in her own mind Dave would understand and not think any the worse of her, kind and gentle man that he was. She wondered if a wedding was the right place to be thinking like this but realised that it was bound to make her think of her own relationship with Dave.
“Thank you Sara. That’s just the confused mood I wanted to catch. The job reference was a nice touch too.”
“I’m not sure it’s that good.” She replied dubiously. “I wasn’t certain exactly what you wanted.”
“No, it’s just the right tone. They’re two worried individuals, uncertain about how the other feels.”
“A case of art imitating life.” Sara murmured.
“What do you mean by that?” I asked her.
“Nothing. Nothing at all.” She replied quickly. “Come on, it’s your turn. How am I going to know where to go until I see what you write?”
“I thought you could see into my mind?”
“Well I can. But there’s so much going on in there at the moment I don’t know what relates to what.”
“Sorry.” I sighed. “Sometimes I have ideas with no story in mind. They sort of float about in my subconscious until they attach themselves to something.”
“Huh!” Sara sounded unconvinced as if she thought I was covering something up. “Anyway, I’ve been thinking too. I’m not sure I should actually be writing stuff for you. You’re supposed to be the writer, not me. I think I should go and see Anerbert and check.”
“Surely it’s the same as you telling me what to write?”
“I don’t ‘tell’. I suggest.”
“Same thing.”
“No it isn’t, and you know it. You always put your own spin on my suggestions.” Sara crossed her arms and puffed out her cheeks. It made her look childlike again, harking back to our first meeting. “So I’m going to check with Annie that I’m merely bending the rules and not actually breaking them. I won’t be long; get writing.” With a muffled Zing! She was gone. I shrugged to myself. She was cute when she tried to talk tough. I looked down at the keyboard and began to type.
The train pulled into the station only a little late. Dave hated to be late, so he got off as quickly as he could. He was to meet Jane outside the S.S. Great Britain. Not knowing exactly how to get there he decided to take a taxi. Jane was nowhere to be seen yet. He sighed with relief and sat down to wait for her. He hoped she wouldn’t be too long. He didn’t mind the wait, but he so wanted to see her pretty smile again. And when he was with her she made him feel so important although he knew he wasn’t. It always made the short time they spent together more precious. If he was going to lose her he would miss that feeling. Jane thought of him in a rose-tinted way, believing him to be something he felt he wasn’t. He wasn’t brave, his temper could be a lot worse than she knew, and he could be stubborn, moody and argumentative. I better tell her all this, he thought. She deserves the full picture of my faults.
“Oh Annie! I don’t know what to do!” Sara cried.
“I really don’t think it matters that much: it is only bending the rules a little, not actually breaking them. Not like taking him into a poem that you both know is finished.” Sara looked guilty.
“You know about that? Does anybody else?”
“Don’t worry, only I know. I am the muse for computer poetry after all.” Anerbert smiled at the worried Sara. “And I’m not telling, I promise.”
“Thank you. In any case, that’s not what I meant. I meant he thought that I was making up the stuff for Jane, but I was using my feelings for him.”
“Really?” Annie was surprised. Sarakuk had never mentioned her feelings before.
“Yes.” The reply was emphatic.
“You think that you might be…” She couldn’t think of any other way to put it. “…in love?”
“Oh I don’t know.” Sara wailed. “I could be utterly wrong. All I know is that when I’m with him I feel complete. Help me Annie, what should I do? Should I quit?”
“I think you should find out he feels before you do anything that drastic.”
“I’ve just remembered something. He said earlier I looked pretty in a bikini. And distracting.”
“Distracting eh? That sounds promising.” Annie hummed.
“Will you come back with me? As a friend not as a muse.”
“As a chaperone perhaps?” Anerbert smiled. Sara blushed.
“Sort of, I suppose.” She looked so crestfallen and worried that Annie gave in.
“All right, I’ll come. But I’ll stay invisible and quiet so he won’t know I’m there. Come on.”
I sat and read through what we had put down so far. Sara’s piece seemed so much better than mine, more emotional for one thing. I sighed. Perhaps she had a point. And if she was breaking rules by helping me in this way maybe I’d better write it all myself. I didn’t want her punished or taken away from me. I knew I’d miss her visits, infrequent though they were. Keeping her as my muse would be more than worth having this story not as good as it might be. With that thought I started to write the next section about Jane.
Jane’s train was arriving. She collected her bags and wandered out of the station, looking for a taxi to take her to the meeting place, some old ship that Dave obviously wanted a look at. She didn’t mind that, he was bound to get there first and have to wait, so he could probably take some pictures until she arrived. She felt in her coat pocket for the compact camera she’d bought, initially for the wedding they were supposed to be going to, but she could also get some pictures of him for a change.
She spotted him before she got out of the taxi. She had been right; he had got his camera out and was shooting pictures of the ship, what was it? The ‘Great Britain’? Jane paid off the cab and went to the bench where Dave’s bag was, sitting down and pulling out her own camera. She got in a couple of shots before he turned around and saw her. He smiled and came and sat next to her. “Been waiting long?” She asked.
“Not really, but I couldn’t resist taking a few pictures.”
“So I saw. I got one or two as well.”
“Of the ship?” He looked puzzled.
“No, of you, you muppet.” She laughed, kissing him on the cheek. He could be so dense sometimes. “Come on, we’ve a hotel to book in to, then we can catch up properly.” A momentary look of worry hurried across his face. She wondered why but said nothing. It did set her thinking though; maybe her own worries were not so far-fetched. They picked up their bags and went to the taxi rank.
There was a different sort of ‘ZING!’ with an echo to it. Sarakuk was beside me and looking at the screen. “You carried on without me.” She said with an accusing tone.
“Well, I was thinking that you were right, and I shouldn’t get you to write stuff directly for me if it’s going to get you into trouble. I couldn’t bear that.”
“Oh!” She seemed surprised.
“You’re my muse; I don’t want to lose you.”
“Your muse. That’s all is it?”
“Can it be anything else?” I was bemused. Sara seemed put out by my attitude, but I couldn’t think why. She was my muse and I was very fond of her, but she wasn’t real was she? The only relationship we could have was writer and muse as far as I could tell.
“Apparently not! Finish this yourself; I’m going to find someone else to help.” With that she was gone. I sighed and turned back to the screen. ‘Perhaps I can put this in.’ I thought. ‘It seems to fit.’
“We have reservations.” Dave said to the receptionist. “Two single rooms for one night.”
“Ah, I can see the mistake. We have it down as one double room for two nights.”
“Well change it.” He was annoyed now. Jane had not seen him so wound up before.
“I’m sorry. All our single rooms are taken for the night sir. The double is the only one available.” Jane tugged Dave out of the way.
“We’ll take it.” She said.
“We will?” Dave was surprised.
“Yes.” Jane took the key and led him to the stairs, remembering his fear of small spaces.
Once they were in the room Jane sat the still agitated Dave down and poured him a drink. “Now calm down. It’s a silly mistake, not the end of the world.” He took the alcohol and knocked it back. “Good. Now what is on your mind? You’ve looked worried since we met up by the ship.”
“Well…” He started to tell her but stopped, unsure how to say what he wanted too despite all his planning on the train. “I don’t know how to say it.” He looked down and then up at Jane. To his utter shock she was crying.
“I knew it.” She wept. “You’ve found someone else haven’t you? All the travelling beat me.” Dave was completely thrown by this sudden turn.
“Jane, darling dearest Jane. You’re so wrong.” He pulled her to him and kissed her full on the lips. “See?”
“Then what can’t you say?” She said, tears still running down her face.
“I can’t …” He shrugged and then sighed. “I don’t know how to tell you I love you.”
“That sounded like a good attempt.” She grinned, her tears drying. He looked surprised.
“It came out easier than I thought.” He smiled. “Now how are we going to resolve this accommodation issue?”
“I think we can come up with something.”
“You can’t say it but you can write it.” A voice from nowhere came. It wasn’t Sara though. “It’s me, Anerbert.” She appeared beside me.
“How long have you been here? And what do you mean?”
“I arrived with Sara. And what I meant, you thick-headed numbskull, is that you can write down that you love her, but you can’t tell her.”
“Who are we talking about here? Jane?”
“SARA you idiot.” Anerbert shook her head. “I’m the poetry muse, but I can tell it’s obvious you’re Dave and Sara is Jane. She picked up on it as soon as she read the first paragraph, that’s why she wrote that second paragraph from her heart. Then you try to help her out and instead tread all over her heart.” I paled.
“I did? I didn’t mean too. I just didn’t want to lose her as my muse.”
“No, that’s just your rationalisation. You don’t want to lose her at all, and you know that.” I sat back and thought. Annie was right, I did love Sara. I always had. That was why I’d made a deal to keep her as my muse. And now it seemed like I’d messed it all up.
“Annie, what do I do?” I asked quietly.
“I honestly don’t know.” She calmed down. “As far as I know, no-one has fallen for their muse before. I really don’t know what might happen. What would be allowed to happen.” She sighed. “But I know who does. We have to go see HIM again.” I gulped.
Sara had run off to hide in the story where she had started as a muse. She noticed for the first time that the title was just ‘Muse’. She also read through the whole thing for once, instead of bits that she had helped with. She was a bit surprised to find out about the visit to the management. It seemed that the feelings she had were not all one way, back here he was the one in love. How had it turned around? When had she started to love him more than he loved her? She felt a momentary tremor, wondering if this was all her fault and then gave in to the tears, curling up and crying to herself, feeling lost and unloved and totally alone.
Anerbert and I arrived in the outer office of the management. It was still as white and stark as before: Except for one desk, out on the edge of my sight. There were splashes of colour all over it, knick-knacks, little toys, strange mementos. Instinctively I knew that was Sara’s desk. I began to move quickly toward it.
“Hey! Where are you going?” Annie called out, running after me.
“This is her desk isn’t it? Maybe she left a clue as to where she went.” I began to search the desk, ignoring the stares of other muses. “Help me Annie; I have to find her before she does something as stupid as me.” She put her hand on my arm.
“I said I didn’t know where she went to, but if you concentrate, I’m sure you will. You go and find her and I’ll see the boss and arrange a meeting. Now go!” I thought hard and suddenly knew where she would go.
“How do I do it?” I asked, before realising I was already on my way.
It was the restaurant where Eddie and Kitty were dining again. I had been right; Sarakuk was hiding as one of the other customers. She was sat way at the back, (like her office desk, I thought) watching my two favourite characters with a dark look in her eyes. Carefully, so as not to scare her, I made my way around behind her and then slipped into the spare seat at the table when she had her back turned.
“Hello Sara.” I said simply. Her head snapped back around, a venomous look in her green eyes, now reddened with tears.
“YOU!”
“Yes muse, me. I want you to come back with me.”
“Why should I?” She pouted. She was reverting to the little girl lost I’d first met. The one I’d first started to fall for.
“Because we have to go and see the management.”
“They want to sack me again I suppose.”
“No, it’s me who wants to ask questions and I think you need to hear the answers.”
“I still don’t see why I should come with you.”
“Because there are things I need to tell you. We can’t just let it drift like this any longer.” I deliberately chose the wording she had used in her paragraph, hoping she caught my inference. She did, reaching across the table and putting her arms around my neck, hugging me closer than ever.
“All right, if it’s with you, I’m ready.” We stood and Sara took us back to the office.
Annie was waiting as we appeared outside the door to the inner office. She didn’t look worried, so I relaxed a little. Sara and Annie hugged. “I’m sorry for rushing off like that.” Sara said. “I was confused and upset and angry all at once.”
“It’s okay. I stayed a while and watched him for you. It turns out he does care more than you know.”
“Yes, I’m sorry Sara. I thought that it wasn’t allowed for me to fall for you. So I didn’t say anything, and stupidly didn’t notice your feelings until …. Well just now.” The three of us hugged now and didn’t notice the office door open.
“AHEM!” The manager’s voice boomed. We all jumped apart. “You requested an interview Anerbert.”
“Yes sir. For Sara and her writer. They have something to ask you.”
“Well, you better come in then.” He grumbled.
The office seemed smaller, a lot smaller. It now looked like a study for a professor. The old man noticed my interest. “I downsized it a bit since your last visit. Now, what can I do for you this time? Sarakuk not helping you enough?”
“Nothing like that sir.” I replied, not as scared of him this time around. “I need some information about the rules for your muses, what they are allowed to do.”
“Really? Sit down the three of you.” We complied. “I don’t know as there are that many rules, lots of guidelines of course. So if you are worried that Sarakuk did some actual writing for you or that you asked her to take you into a poem that was already finished, then don’t” All three of us gasped.
“How…How did you know sir?” Sara asked meekly. He leant forward.
“Because that’s my job Sarakuk, and it has been for millennia.” He winked at her.
“Actually sir, it’s more serious than that.” I said. “I’ve fallen in love with Sara, and more to the point, she appears to have fallen in love with me. Is this going to cause problems, especially for you?”
“Well, seeing as Sarakuk is exclusively your muse, it’s not going to bother me too much. The biggest problem is going to be for you two.”
“How come sir? We’ll be together won’t we?”
“Yes, but you see Sarakuk won’t age and you will. Can the both of you handle that?”
“Well it won’t be too bad for me.” I said. “But will you be alright Sara, watching me age?” Her lip trembled a little.
“I’d like to find out.” She said a touch quaveringly.
“Then in that case, sir, I would like your permission to ask for Sara to marry me.”
“You carry on my boy.” I looked into the glowing faces of Annie and Sara and slipped onto one knee in front of my muse.
“Yes.” She said before I asked anything.
“And I know where the wedding is.” Said Annie.
Jane hung onto Dave’s arm, holding him close, determined not to lose him. He kissed her gently, vowing the same thing. They stood as the bride, Sarah, started to walk down the aisle. Anne, the bridesmaid, gave them a wink as she passed them. Down at the front Dave, the other Dave, was waiting, smiling as Sarah approached.
At the reception I met them, Dave and Jane, and told them to believe in each other and it would be all right, I promised. I was looking at the sunset nursing a drink when the management came over to me.
“I’d like to ask you a favour young man.”
“Sir, I’m not that young.”
“You are compared to me, everyone is.” I smiled.
“Go on then what is it? The favour.”
“When your time comes and you leave this mortal world, would you come and work for me?”
“As a muse? I don’t think I could.”
“No, I have plenty of muses, and new ones keep popping up all the time. I need a hand in the office. An assistant. Even a replacement. I think it would be about time for a holiday by then.”
“Would I still be married to Sara?” He smiled a huge smile.
“If you want, yes. You might be tired of her by then though.” I looked around at where Sara was dancing, realising she was dancing with someone else from my stories, another me in fact. All the wedding guests were my story characters and they were all here to wish me luck.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be tired or bored with her sir, eternity will not seem long at all with her at my side.”
It was late into the night before I carried Sara to our room. “What were you talking to the old man about?” she asked.
“Is that any way to talk about your father?”
“He’s not!”
“Of course he is. The father of all the muses, and the boss too.”
“Even if he is, what were you talking about?”
“He offered me a job.”
“You’re making this up! You make it sound like a wedding from a soap opera.”
“I am telling you the truth, and you know you can read it in my mind.” She concentrated for a while and then a huge smile split her face.
“He gave you eternity with me.” She flung her arms around me. “What a marvellous wedding gift!!”
.
